Before I write the following post, I need to be clear on some things. The lovely Sharon knows how to change a car wheel. She has never actually done it but she knows. She knows how to check the water in her car and the oil. She can even test the water to see if the level of antifreeze is correct by measuring its specific gravity. She does have a degree in chemistry.

This morning the fog was thick. It is weather I love, as it gives the bare trees a deep winter feel as they fade in and out on the edge of visibility. The cars were encased in frost. Frost that is thin and tough and has crazy spiral patterns that makes the geek in me think of fractals and mandelbrot sets. On mornings like these I spray deicer on the windows of our cars. It seems that some mornings are not like these. On some mornings jack frost sniffs around the lovely Sharon’s car but gives mine a wide berth. On those mornings I never think to check the lovely Sharon’s car and she has to do it herself, if she can.

As I enter the house and casually mention the ice on the cars, the lovely Sharon panics and frantically screams “spray mine, my car, my car, mine!” What can be the panic? “The other day I couldn’t get my deicer to work”. I must be hearing things. We could not run out of deicer, as Santa always gets us a couple of tins every year, each. And we only ever get through nearly one tin a year. We could never run out of deicer. “It wouldn’t work. I couldn’t get the lid off it”.

I think the lovely Sharon needs to start going to the gym.